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Thursday, December 31, 2009

2010 .. Beginning Again!

To say that ten years has gone by doesn't seem overly monumental .. until you begin to recount the things that have occurred in that period of time. Did all of that really happen in that span? It did! And you know what it tells me? Life is too short .. time is gone in a blink .. and life should be lived and not wasted.

Rick and I met in the year 2000 and were married in 2001. Our family was created during the last decade. Our older two went from children to teenagers. And our little two were born and are now the ages that Kyndal and Dawson were when Rick and I met. How strange!

In the course of 10 short years I gave up my career to devote my life to my family full time. Rick developed himself professionally to the point that he is literally a force to be reckoned with in his field.

We've lived with minimal. We've lived in the "middle". And we've lived in extravagance. And not one of them has been any better or worse than the other. One thing is clear, though, extravagance does not equal joy.

In this period of time I've pulled away from family and then drawn closer. I have believed that my way of living was the only way of living and then realized that it just isn't true. I have been in a place of self-superiority and come to a place where I realize just how pretentious it all has been.

I have learned that even the greatest of marriages almost fail (and some actually do), that raising your children to love God and with strict moral values does not mean they will go the way you want them to go, and that friendships change because people continually do.

Most of all I have learned that for 10 years I have done nothing but live how I thought others wanted me to live, hardly taking the time to ask myself what would make me happy and bring me true joy. I have looked as though, on the surface, I have "had it all", but realize I don't have anything if I don't experience true joy with what I do have.

The years of '09 seem to be great years of change for me. In 1989, I graduated from high school and embarked on my true independence. In 1999, I started another new life when I divorced Kyndal and Dawson's dad. And in 2009, I find myself ready to start something new again. I don't know what those new things are, yet. But, you can be sure that Rick and I will dream and discuss and plan and then do!

Life is too short .. and there's lots to do in the next 10 years!

In 10 years, my children will be 25, 23, 16 and 14. Rick and I will have been married just under 20 years. My parents will be retired. All of my siblings will be 40 and older. We will definitely all be in new stages in our lives. What will we do between now and then? I pray time is not wasted on things that just do not matter.

Have a wonderful New Year!

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