This Just In ...

Click on the images on the right sidebar to see what the kids are up to!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Is Your Husband Your Best Friend?

I know women who have a deep need to spend time with the girls. I've never been like that .. not even when I was a teenager. Sure, I like to have friends to go have dinner with occasionally, or to hang out with at "An Affair of the Heart" a couple of times a year, or to discuss issues about marriage and children and such. But, I'm just not one who needs to have my regular "girl time".

But having someone I trust, to really share my heart with, is important to me. And I've found that that person does not have to be a female. And in my case, it's not. For me, Rick is the only person I trust enough to really share the inner workings of my heart .. my desires, needs, fears, irritations and dreams. Female friends in my life have come and gone. There always seems to be something that causes those relationships to end ... expectations that don't get met on one or the other end.

Recently I had some health scares. I remember telling Rick that if my tests results came back badly, that there wasn't any person (other than my family) that I would share those results with. I wouldn't want women to all-of-a-sudden decide that I was their friend when I clearly hadn't been up to that point. I don't want pity friends. I don't want friends who feel like they need to fix me. I don't particularly want friends who even feel like they need to help me. (When I need help, I'll ask for it.) Thankfully my test results came back fine.

My mom is my good friend. I do have women mentors in my life who I turn to when I need help or advice. And I have friends I enjoy spending time with on occasion. But I do not have a female best friend. And quite honestly I don't think I ever will. I've given up on that quest, in this season of my life.

I have Rick.

During times where I have displayed the worst of me, he has been hurt. He has even responded poorly at times. But when he has told me he will fight for our relationship he has. He hasn't just said the words. He has backed it up with action. To me, he is what a true friend is .. someone who you have disappointed, and who has disappointed you, but always works through those disappointments and comes out stronger with you on the other end. Or, at the very least, just comes out with you.

Rick, you are my best friend. I know I don't always treat you the way a friend should, but I am thankful you are here.


  1. I am so glad I am not the only one who considers my DH by best friends. I do have girl friends that I get with but really we all go out as couples anymore. When the girls do send me a text that states "girls night out" I usually stay home with my DH. I like being home with DH. That is one of the reasons I married him. We became friends first.

  2. I so desire my husband and I to be best friends. I don't feel that he wants to be that "best friend" to me. He doesn't listen to me when I have problems and when I am an emotional wreck, he completely avoids me. It hurts me badly and I so desire that from him. I just don't know how to get there with him. I am very jealous of couples who are best friends (just being transparent). I sometimes prefer to do just girl things than be with couples because then I don't have to see the relationship in others that I want. That sounds terrible huh?? Thanks for letting me vent.

  3. As far as I'm concerned, that's really the way it should be...that's what you call a BLESSING.

  4. You sound so much like me!!! This is exactly how I am with my husband! You and I share many similarities--struggles and joys. I know that I don't usually post comments but I enjoy your blog and read it almost everyday. Plus I love keeping up with Brynne! Thanks for sharing your heart with us who read this blog!

  5. I feel the same way you do. Jace and I are best friends and I would much rather be with him than a "girls night out." I don't desire that, I never have and if you notice when it is just "girls" I am on the phone with him at least once during the night and I am always ready to be home. When we go out as couples it's fun and we always enjoy it but I want to be with him. We tell each other EVERYTHING and I wouldn't want it any other way. That's how its supposed to be and how God wants it to be.

  6. My hubby and I are and were good friends. That's what keeps us still together.


Getting comments is the BEST part of blogging! Please leave me one, if you want to! Even if you don't have a blog, just leave me an "Anonymous" comment and sign your name in the body of the comment. I love to see who's reading all this craziness that comes from my mind! Have a great day!